Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you yourself will be just like him. -‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭26:4‬ ‭(NIV)

Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. -2 Timothy 4:2 (NIV)

One of the phrases that has most resonated with me in the past year is: Your response is your responsibility.

Every once in a while–or perhaps on a regular basis–there’s a person who knows how to push your buttons. They know exactly which ones to press to escalate the situation. Your flesh is burning with the desire to right the wrong, isn’t it?

Biblical examples of how to handle provocation

But there’s biblical backup in not fighting fire with fire. Take Jeremiah and Jesus.

Jeremiah: Waiting for the truth to be spoken

Hananiah, by all accounts, seemed to be a legitimate prophet to the people of Israel…till he opened his mouth and proclaimed false, but highly encouraging, prophecies to the people. Jeremiah, a true prophet of the Lord, bit his tongue and waited to hear the truth from the Lord…and only then did he go to Hananiah and let him know the price he would pay for misrepresenting the Lord to His people. It wasn’t a pretty truth (far longer suffering for the people, and death for Hananiah in under a year), but it was the truth.

Jesus: Step over the traps

Jesus, of course, is our prime example. He was very much in the spotlight during his brief public ministry…and He had a target on His head! The Pharisees loved to try and trap Him, especially in front of onlookers. But what did Jesus do when prodded? He laid down knowledge and truth on the Pharisees, who were not looking for answers, but instead looking to harm Him.

## This is everyday spiritual warfare

These are the battles we believers fight. We battle not just external evil and sin, but that within…and we have a choice in how we respond: with grace and truth, or compounding sin upon sin?

So we don’t have to be silent, or even avoid the provocateurs. We can wait till the time is right, and speak the truth. When we do that, we carry God’s light into enveloping darkness. We never, ever have to stoop and stumble to the level of those who are pushing our buttons.

Instead, when they throw fire at us, we are water. Water doesn’t fuel a fire. It puts it out.

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. -Romans 12:14,19 (NIV)

Oh, the temptation to “right” someone else when you feel wronged! It can dominate you in the blink of an eye…if you let it.

“I can’t let that slide!” you think. And in the heat of the moment, you know you’re right. And you know the other person needs to be put in their place.

But before you reactively respond to someone else’s words or actions, stop and remember who you’re representing. You are God’s hands and feet. You are His ambassador. And He is present and affected as you choose your actions and words.

Fire, meet water

Escalation of a situation often happens when contributors keep adding fuel to the fire. So instead of throwing kindling on the fire, soothe and counter it with water. And try as it may, fire cannot set water aflame!

The verse above is part of larger exhortation from Paul to the Romans at the end of the twelfth chapter, which goes on to say:

On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. -Romans 12:20-21 (NIV)

It’s your choice

So, the next time you’re thrown a jab or a barb…the next time someone cuts you off in traffic…the next time your name is trampled in front of others…choose to not fan the flame. Choose to be the serene river where the fire must meet and retreat.

Be water, my friend…cool, refreshing, and replenishing. God has plenty more to flow down to you…so much, you’ll be overflowing. You’d be surprised how quickly the heat will dissipate without you adding to it!